Mission Impossible

In the past month and a half, God has put some amazing things on my heart but when I look at the mountains that are ahead, I think that it is an impossible mission. I feel like this is something that will live in my dreams and never find a way to turn into actual solid matter, so to speak. In short, I am doubting my ability to have enough faith to keep praying, even when it looks like it will never happen.
Though the story of the Moses is a great one to read for encouragement, it discourages me in that I don't want to wait 40 years for the changes in my life to finally become a reality. I think of Abraham and Sarah waiting on a baby and I think, "Gosh I don't want to be old and gray." I do believe in God's perfect timing but it doesn't make it any easier to wait, even with the level of patience that I have been given by God. So what do I do in the meantime.....
(1) Pray-Pray as hard as I can as often as I can. Pray for the miracles God has put before me to happen but pray also for God to rest my mind and help me to continue to have hope.
(2) Play - Play with my kids...keep myself busy. Work out, whatever I can do to have fun and keep my mind occupied.
(3) Take it one day at a time. I allow myself time to reflect on the dreams that God has put on my heart but I remember that it is going to be His timing no matter what. My anxiety won't help and I have to focus on the day at hand.

Accepting the Inevitable

I am a big believer in God's ability to make miracles happen. In fact, I believe that He orchestrates things perfectly in our lives. With that belief, however, comes the reality that sometimes He's going to allow things to be cleansed from your life that just aren't good for you. Sometimes it's a habit. Sometimes it's a thing that is taking up too much of your time. Sometimes it's a person. People are the hardest.
As much patience as God has allowed me to learn, I have very little tolerance for losing things in my life. I have little tolerance for feeling like I've failed at my friendships and relationships with people. The fact is that sometimes letting go of someone isn't about failing; it's about being strong enough to end the friendship while there is still a friendship to end. It's about maintaining civility sometimes and remembering that God calls us to be peacemakers. Sometimes, as much as it feels like you've done something wrong, God just knows what's best in the situation. He simply asks that you accept the inevitable and move forward. He asks that you keep moving down His path and trust Him to lead you to something better than what you had before. Maybe, down the line, He'll bring that person back into your life. Maybe He won't. The fact is that your reliance is on Him, not a person, thing or habit.
Knowing all this rationally doesn't stop me from kicking and screaming every time I have to face a loss in my life. I kick and scream because I don't want to fail. I kick and scream because I'm scared of the big changes and I know that it's gonna be hard. God never promised us that life would be easy. He simply promised that if we rested in His arms, we would find peace.

How much is too much?

One of my goals for the year was to weed the people and things out of my life that cause chaos and grief. I literally disciplined myself to prayerfully look at each and every person and thing in my life, no matter how big or small my contact with them was, and to question everything and everyone. I questioned whether or not they were helpful, harmful or neutral. If they were neutral, I tried to push a step further and see if I could either make them a friend or see that it was not meant to be. If they were harmful, I respectfully but firmly ended the relationship leaving an open door if the drama ever stopped. Alot of these were relatively easy and I could see the harm overtaking the positive. Some of these relationships, however, were and continue to be extremely difficult to let go of. My question becomes this: How much is too much to allow in your life?
The Bible is hard to read on this. It says in no uncertain terms in the Bible to avoid constantly being in the company of fools. It says in no uncertain terms that you should guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life. Then, other verses point out that if your enemy strikes you on one cheek, you should turn the other and let them strike it as well. It points out that it is not the well that need the doctor but the sick. It points out that forgiveness is of the utmost importance. So how much is too much to let a person continue to hurt you?
My conclusions are relatively simple.....
*Forgiveness does not mean re-inviting that person into your life. Prayer leads the way in someone that has hurt you. Anger and un-forgiveness in your heart leads to a festering boil on your heart. It's what you have to live with. Search the motives of the person you are forgiving and then search your own. Sometimes patience and perseverance are going to be keys.
*Though you should always be seeking to share God's Word with people, there should be a stable support system in your life that is NOT made up of a bunch of idiots. There should be people there that will listen, give sound advice and support you in your decision.
*The turn the other cheek advice is only listed for your enemy and enemy is a strong word meaning "adversary." There are not many in most people's lives that are actual enemies. I believe that this refers more to overcoming what the enemy throws at you and letting them know that you have God on your side and you're NOT backing down. Instead of using anger and violence, you should use peace.
*When all else fails and you can't figure out what you should do based on differing verses in the Bible, prayer will always give you the answer. God sees the whole picture and He will provide whatever the circumstances. He is the maker of all things.
So how much is too much? It's a matter of circumstance, I think.

Are we too easy?

I've recently been a little frustrated at the me-me-me in my household as well as in society in general. My generation is known as the "Me Generation" and it is NOT something that I'm proud of at all. I was raised from the generation of baby boomers who wanted to give me more than they had and until the age of about fifteen, I was given the very best material things all of the time, no question. I was given great opportunities, went on great vacations, and so on and so forth. At fifteen, I was given a jolt when my parents divorced and we could no longer afford the best. Through a series of circumstances, I was introduced to a vastly different lifestyle where working as soon as I turned sixteen was essential and where I had to choose between this or that. This is a lesson I loathed at the time but love as a grown woman because it taught me so many lessons that I wouldn't have gotten elsewhere including (but not limited to) work ethic, doing your job even if you don't like someone or the job itself, how to handle money, how to manage time, organizational skills, and balancing between wants and needs.
As a preschool teacher, nanny, and now a mother, I am often confused by the balance between too much responsibility and too little on our kids. Our teen pregnancy rate is higher than it was when I was a child. Our juvenile hall numbers are staggering. There are alot more kids walking around with attitudes towards their parents and any other authority figure. Don't get me wrong; there are alot of kids who are turning out great but there are alot who are also spinning out of control. While I believe in every parent's right to choose how to parent their children, I also think that there are alot of parents that raise their children feeling guilty and entitled. I watch and wonder what the difference is between one parent's job and another's.
The last thing is this world that I want is my kids living with me forever telling me what to cook them for breakfast and never reaching their full potential. The fact is that I want my children to be independent and thriving. I am often criticized for making the kids contribute to our household through age-appropriate chores because I should "let them be kids." The fact is that they are allowed abundant time to play and carry on, but they need to learn at a young age that responsibility is just part of life. Fifteen minutes of chores is not too much to ask them. I am criticized for asking the older ones to help the younger ones but I believe that service is something that SHOULD be taught. Helping someone out is not a bad thing. YES, my children are daily moving towards independence and I love that. They are moving towards understanding a work ethic and learning how to work as a team and I love that. We are starting to focus on being charitable and putting others' needs first and I love that. I am looking at the bigger picture and what these lessons will teach them down the road. I am looking at how I want them to turn out and what I want them to remember from their childhood. There are going to be bumps in the road and mistakes but, by golly, I want them to learn to be healthy, respectful, productive members of society that know how to think for themselves and respect their bodies, souls, and minds.
I think if there were a few more people who though less of me-me-me, we might have a somewhat more productive world.