Jealousy, deserving things, and others

Recently, I have been observing people's behavior more and more. I have watched some of my friends go through really difficult situations and others achieve such amazing blessing that it seems almost overwhelming. I have gone through things myself and watched how people tried to help me or handle things. Sadly, I have found a few things that I'd like to vent about...things that aggravate me because of the level of disrespect that they seem to show.
(1) Jealousy: Jealousy seems to be the blame of a number of situations. It seems to be the word that most people use as any excuse for why people act like jerks to each other. An example was a situation I had several months ago with some women that repeatedly referred to me as "preppy cheer mom" because I smiled alot. Though I found it to be funny, it was also agitating that someone would take time out of their day to say something catty to me because I smiled. I was told that the women were "jealous" because of the remarks that they said (more than just the one.) What I believe to be true is that they were not jealous at all. Jealousy indicates resentment because of another's success, rivalry, or advantages. If I were a Swedish supermodel, maybe that would be the case, but I don't believe that they were jealous. I think that this particular case (and many more) have more to do with insecurity than jealousy. I think that some people have a tendency to just spout off ugliness to bring people down so they can feel better about themselves and that it has more to do with their insecurity than actual jealousy.
(2) Deserving what you get: I have a really difficult time with this particular statement, even having a hard time saying it. Perhaps it's the level of empathy that God put in my heart but watching someone lose everything that they have or have their marriage fall apart (or anything else) isn't any easier to watch because they brought on their issues themselves. Yes, I do believe that you reap what you sow..call it karma or Godsmack or whatever. Yes, I do believe that your choices determine your outcome most of the time. With that said, no one really deserves to suffer. We are all equal in God's eyes no matter what sins you've committed. Period. Compassion in one of the greatest gifts that God gave us and saying that someone "deserves what they get" quite often takes that gift away.
(3) Apologies and lack thereof: I honestly believe that apologies are one of the building blocks of any good relationship (friendship, family, love, etc). People are going to let you down and they're going to make mistakes. The biggest difference in my relationships in life was the ability of people to admit when they were wrong and apologize for it. Conversely, it is also important how someone reacts to you when you apologize. If you apologize to someone and they react with a guilt trip, it's often times not as appealing to be around them as someone who accepts your apology and moves on. Apologies don't indicate that you are expecting someone to forget your mistake...just to forgive it. Apologies, like pictures, are worth a thousand words.
(4) Different vs wrong: Just because someone's outlook on life, discipline, etc is different than yours doesn't make it wrong. I see this reflected in parenting all too often. (i.e. "My child will NEVER throw a tantrum like that") The fact is that God created us differently so that we would react to things differently. Variety is the spice of life and people handle things differently, especially when it comes to parenting. Different kids need different disciplinary tactics sometimes...some throw more tantrums, some are more weepy, and some are more smart mouth. There are tactics to deal with them (and other people). Just because your treatment might be different doesn't make THEIRS wrong.
(5) I-Know-What's-Best Syndrome: I have found that many people are infected with I-Know-What's-Best Syndrome. They ALWAYS think that they know the solution to any problem. They ALWAYS think that they can fix their friends, family, etc. No one knows what's best all the time. Period.
(6) Reaction vs Reflection: I constantly say to my kids that they don't have to react to what their siblings do. They are frequently told to "ignore it." Sometimes, as an adult, it's difficult not to react when someone calls you a bad name, criticizes you, or just acts ugly toward you. I am just as guilty as the next person of sounding off. However, it is more productive to reflect on their behavior and why they might be doing it than to react to it. In the moment, reacting feels good sometimes but later, it often results in regret. (At least on my part).
(7)Life's About Choices: This is the last point, but certainly not the least. Life's about choices and, while people are always saying this, often times others are going to be judgmental about yours. You can't make everyone happy and it would exhaust you to try. Do what's right for you and your kids and just accept that people will sound off and it doesn't really matter.